So much for watu wa Nairobi

       Let’s say you have gone to the village for that Matanga or for that wedding of which is very rare and at the village the respect accorded people from Nairobi is very much and in essence the special preferences are just but hilarious.

    Sample some of the hilarious quotes given to “Watu Wa Nairobi”


“Zile choo ni za watu wa kutoka Nairobi. Wenyeji tafadhali endeni kwa jirani ama mtafute pa kujisaidia”

“Hii tent nyuma yangu ni ya wageni wa Nairobi.Kama wewe si wa Nairobi amka tafadhali…

“Tafadhali muache watu wa Nairobi wakule kwanza. Wanataka kuaanza safari mapema.

“Tafadhali ukipewa nafasi ya kuongea,jaribu kuwa mfupi.Hali ya anga si mzuri. Tuko na wageni kutoka Nairobi wanataka waondoke,ukiendelea kuongea nitakunyang’anya microphone na hiyo haitakuwa picha mzuri mbele ya wageni kutoka Nairobi.”

“Hizo maji za chupa ni Za Watu Kutoka Nairobi, wenyeji Kuna tap hapo nyuma.

However when it come to the end of the Matanga or the function it surprises many how the watu wa Nairobi end up rushing to the nearest  Changaa den to taste “Akamachina” or  ya Mawe. The villagers are left wondering just what is wrong with the watu wa Nairobi as they are seen misbehaving in the village after taking copious amounts of ya mawe.

Interestingly some of the watu wa Nairobi will hover to the next local Pub and drink all their money only to start calling their friends in town with all sorts of explanations about why they did not have fare back to go back to their jobs and return to the city.

It is the same watu wa Nairobi who will embark on a gallant display of weird behavior in their skimpy clothes and strange mannerisms of how they cannot do without their face book and twitter.

Worse of is in a funeral they will be obsessed withy shamelessly taking photos of every angle of the funeral and rush to post it on social media, albeit without a care of the agony of the bereaved family.

…SOO MUCH FOR Watu wa Nairobi

Words by Ceasar Musungu


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